19. Pulling > Pushing

Today we’ll use fitness as a metaphor. When it comes to resistance training, there are push exercises and there are pull exercises. Ask anyone who knows what they’re talking about, and they’ll probably tell you that one should put more emphasis on pull than push. For every push exercise you do, a good rule of thumb in most cases is to do 2 pull exercises. Generally, pulling is more important than pushing. At the same time, if you neglect pushing altogether, you’ll become unbalanced. I can teach you more about that another time if you’re curious, but for now I’ll explain the metaphor.

In life, as in fitness, pulling is more important than pushing. Said differently, being pulled is more impactful than being pushed. Have you ever been on a group hike? It’s always the person at the front who sets the pace. If you’re looking to get faster and fitter, put the fastest, fittest person at the front. They’ll pull the group ahead because it’s not a good feeling to fall behind. If you put the slowest person at the front, the whole group slows down. With no one out front pulling the group forward, pace automatically settles below the potential of the slowest hiker. You can certainly encourage them and push them from behind, but I’m here to tell you that the most effective way to help someone move forward in life is to get to the top of the hill first and pull them up. If you’re looking to propel yourself, get out of the mindset of pushing yourself and find something that’s going to pull you.

This is about the difference between pushing yourself to go to the gym and being pulled there by your better future self. It’s about your mission pulling you out of bed in the morning before the alarm goes off. Without a mission, nothing pulls you through the day, so you end up pushing yourself endlessly. Nothing is more exhausting than pushing yourself through life. Day after day, finding the strength to keep showing up and completing whatever tasks come across your plate. You’ll run out of gas pushing yourself, but if there’s something pulling you, you’ll have limitless fuel.

So how do you tap into this limitless fuel and hitch a ride through life anyway? Well, we could make it as simple as consistently setting goals. A goal worthy of accomplishment has a way of making people do things they normally wouldn’t. If a goal is important enough, there isn’t anything that could stop someone from achieving it. It becomes automatic to do whatever it takes to achieve the goal. That said, let’s be clear that not all goals are effective, even important ones.